Read the Invitation Before You Spend a Penny

The invitation is your only reliable guide, and the wording is deliberate. If it says morning dress, the groom and his party will be in tailcoats, and turning up in a relaxed suit will look thoughtless. If it says lounge suits, a well-pressed two-piece in navy, charcoal or mid-grey is exactly right. Black tie means a dinner jacket for the gentlemen and a long or elegant cocktail dress for the ladies. Cocktail sits somewhere between the two. When the invitation says nothing at all, look at the time and the venue: a midday ceremony in a country church and an evening reception in a hotel are two entirely different dress codes. If you are still unsure, ask a member of the wedding party rather than another guest — nobody wants to be the person who guessed wrong first.

The Golden Rules Everyone Should Follow

• No white, ivory, cream or champagne. This is the bride's territory, and the rule applies to dresses, trouser suits, jumpsuits and even a cream blouse worn as the main event.
• Avoid anything resembling a bridal gown. No long white lace, no trains, no veils. Guests should never be mistaken for the bride in photographs.
• Do not outshine the couple. Sequins, dramatic slits and statement millinery belong at a different party. Aim for quietly expensive rather than loudly memorable.
• Skip jeans, trainers, shorts and beachwear. They are wrong at a formal wedding, however expensive they were.
• Think twice about head-to-toe black for a daytime celebration. It can read as funereal. Black with bright accessories or a colourful hat is perfectly acceptable.
• Cover up for the ceremony. Bare shoulders in a church are still considered disrespectful by many families, so bring a wrap or jacket.

Gentlemen: Morning Dress, Lounge Suits and Everything Between

Morning dress is usually reserved for the wedding party and immediate family, so unless the invitation specifically requests it, a lounge suit is your safest and most flattering choice. Choose wool or a wool blend in navy, charcoal or mid-grey for autumn and winter, and pale grey, soft blue or a lightweight linen blend in summer. A two-piece is fine; a three-piece adds formality if you own one you actually like wearing.

Details carry the look. Wear a silk tie in a restrained pattern or a solid colour, never a novelty print. Polish your leather Oxfords or brogues properly, and make sure your belt matches your shoes. Socks should match your trousers rather than your footwear. A crisp white or pale blue shirt with a neat collar finishes things off, and a pocket square is a lovely touch if it is folded simply. And keep the tuxedo for the evening — a dinner jacket before six o'clock looks like a mistake.

Ladies: Length, Fabric and Modest Elegance

A dress or a tailored two-piece is ideal. For a formal daytime wedding, hemlines from just on the knee to midi work beautifully; full length is better saved for black tie or a very grand evening affair. Look for fabrics that hold their shape — silk, crepe, wool crepe, good-quality cotton — and avoid thin jersey that clings and creases before the speeches.

Hats remain traditional at church weddings and are warmly welcomed, though a fascinator is an acceptable modern alternative. It is usually fine to keep a hat on indoors during the reception, but remove it for the meal if it blocks anyone's view. At civil ceremonies, headwear is entirely optional. Choose colour thoughtfully: rich jewel tones, soft pastels and seasonal florals all photograph well, and a bright colour is often a compliment to the couple's palette.

Black Tie and Evening Receptions

For gentlemen, black tie means a dinner jacket — black or midnight blue — with matching trousers carrying a single satin stripe, a pleated white dress shirt, and a black bow tie. Learn to tie it yourself if you can; a ready-tied version is forgivable, but a self-tied one looks considerably better by midnight. Patent or highly polished shoes, discreet cufflinks and no wristwatch with a dinner suit if you want to be strictly correct.

Ladies should choose a long gown or a refined cocktail dress with heels, a small clutch and restrained jewellery. If you are invited to both the ceremony and an evening black-tie reception, plan for a change of clothes, or at least a change of shoes. A hotel room or a spacious car boot has saved many a guest from an uncomfortable six hours.

Practical Comfort: Shoes, Weather and Long Days

British weddings are long, and many of them happen on grass, gravel or uneven church paths. Block heels, wedges or a sturdy sole will keep you upright; stilettos sink. Heel protectors are a small investment that saves both your shoes and your dignity. Bring a spare pair of comfortable flats in the car for the dancing, and consider a spare pair of tights if you are wearing them.

Church interiors are cold, marquees are draughty and British weather is unpredictable, so a wrap, pashmina or tailored jacket is essential rather than optional. A compact umbrella in a neutral colour never goes amiss. Finally, remember the shape of the day: a full church service involves sitting, standing and kneeling, so wear something you can move in with grace. Dress with care, and you will spend the day thinking about the couple rather than your outfit.